When a merciless bear poacher is caught and arrested deep in the woods of a state park, he and his truck are taken to a neglected precinct in the heart of a dying city. Unbeknownst to the authorities, the impounded truck holds a deadly cargo in the form of the legendary Sasquatch. Now, stuck in an unfamiliar world, the creature will let nothing and no one stop it from coming face-to-face with the unscrupulous man who ruthlessly ripped it from its environment in "Assault of the Sasquatch"
Growing up I always loved creature features and monster movies, both of these sub-genres don't get nearly enough love these days, and part of it I strongly believe is thanks to SyFy's non-stop horde of half assed animal versus animal flicks. When I got "Assault of the Sasquatch" in the mail I must admit I was excited to sit down and watch it, I hoped for three things, gore, laughs, and more gore and that is exactly what it delivered.
The story is your typical cookie cutter cryptozoology story, hunters bag the big bad Sasquatch, it gets brought into town, and havoc ensues. I wouldn't change a thing about it, it's basic, campy, and fun, I hope many of our readers will give this movie a chance and go in not expecting something serious and Oscar worthy but simply a fun blood soaked creature feature, made to be watched with a bowl of popcorn and a room of friends.
The special effects are your average buckets of blood and latex, nothing special but all done well and should please any gore hounds looking for a quick fix of entrails and various dismembered limbs thrown about by a very pissed off Sasquatch. One of my favorite kill scenes involves the Sasquatch throwing various objects at a young man ending with a very large surprise to finish him off that I will not spoil, but anyone who follows real life cryptozoology knows they have been known to throw rocks and such when threatened, I thought little details like that really added to the overall feel of the flick and was great fan service for crypto fans out there.
One thing that surprises me is the fact that this isn't being marketed as a horror/comedy but instead just a straight up horror flick, while I understand the horror/comedy market has become way over populated with everyone trying to create the next "Shaun of the Dead" or "Zombieland" but where most of them fall flat on their face devoid of laughs, "Assault of the Sasquatch" has some great laughs and while this film would be a great choice for any stoners out there looking for a hazy eyed flick to enjoy, the laughs would not be loss on the general public, no beer goggles or smoke clouds required for this one to get you chuckling a time or two.
Growing up scanning mom and pop video rental shelves for crazy 80s/90s cover art often lead me into the arms of various humorous flicks that were made for the sole purpose of having a blast with some friends, "Assault of the Sasquatch" breathes life into that experience and for that it earned my respect, it's cheesy, silly, over the top, poorly acted, and one hell of a fun ride for any fans of gore and laughs, you won't see this film winning awards but if you give it a chance you'll have a good time with a good flick.
On behalf of The Liberal Dead I give "Assault of the Sasquatch" a solid 6 out of 10 and award for most humorous use of "Fuck" as a one liner in a while, and an second award for best hand to hand combat against an Sasquatch in cinema history.
6/10
- Ted "Ritualistic" Brown
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